Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Coming up for air...

I recall not that long ago saying I would post another blog in a week or two.  Alas, it's been over 2 months since then.  I know - I'm terrible.

To get you up to speed (all 5 of you who read this), my surgery went good, drugs were great, but kept me knocked out for the better part of 2 weeks.  That made it really difficult to focus on writing, but I got caught up on all the things I DVRed for the last year so kudos to that.

No sooner had I returned to work, I had to leave again.  This time for bereavement.  My grandmother passed away so I was out of town for a few days.  She was an amazing lady and I feel truly blessed to have had her in my life as an inspiration on the type of woman I want to be.  I know she was listening and smiling down as I read something I wrote at her funeral.  It was about putting to use the lessons she taught all of us - lessons on compassion, perseverance, and, most of all, love.

The greatest joy of that day was when my great-aunt got up and read a journal entry from my grandmother.  To hear her words once more meant the world to all of us.  I asked my uncle if I could get a copy of that entry and he did one better - he is giving me ALL my grandmother's journals.  I have promised to compile them into a keepsake book for the family and I really hope it will help us all when we need her words of encouragement.  Man, I really miss that lady.

So now I'm back to 'the norm'.  For the last month I've struggled to get this third book (Playing with Fire) completed.  Needless to say, I'm still working on it, but I'm hopeful it will be done within the next 2 weeks.  That's the goal.

I had hoped to complete 4 books by September 14th, since that is one year since I because published.  But I'm not sure if that will happen.  I may be a week or so behind that schedule, but I'll do my best to keep the momentum going.

In reading what I have so far with Playing with Fire, I can see where I have improved in these last 9 months as a writer.  I really like where the story is going and my editor says I do a wonderful job with the dialog and plotting.  It's an amazing feeling to know I am living my dream.

It hit me the other day exactly what I've accomplished with my writing.  Don't get me wrong, I have a lot of milestones to still reach, selling 1,000 books is the next one.  But for doing all the legwork myself I'm pleased with the 350 I've sold so far.  It's a start.

When I think ahead to really living the reality of writing full time, I can't wait! My heart wants to burst with giddiness.  I have dreamed for so long about this and every day I get closer to that goal.

I must say that since my grandmother's passing in late May, my outlook on things has improved.  I don't stress as much, I take more time to breathe and let go.  Her mantra was always, "God is gonna work it out".  Even when people took advantage or things seemed all downhill, she was steadfast in that mantra and now I carry it on. 

All the bumps and bruises life has given, all the fails and near misses, all the victory dances and tears of joy....all are part of a much bigger plan than I can even imagine.  I know some of the hard times I have used in my books, to show you can get through them.  And even in the midst of dispair, there is always hope. 

Most of all I pray that is what I give to readers who are struggling.  Hope that true love isn't just fiction, that it starts with loving yourself and finding the joy in each day.  From there, God has a way of working it all out.

I truly appreciate any of you who take the time to read these posts.  I know I ramble sometimes, but it's all off the cuff and I pray that the jumbling words find a way to make sense.  I am so much more grateful today than I was yesterday, or the day before.

thank you, thank you, thank you.

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