Sunday, January 8, 2017

Find the Reset

I looked at the calendar today and realized we are already eight days into 2017.  What makes me so super sad about that is that these last eight days feel like just any other day of 2016, and that isn't how the new year is ever supposed to feel!  I'm making day 8 into day 0.  Time to reset....

I could blame this feeling on not setting any resolutions, on not promising to loss weight or bitch less.  I could blame it on missing the actual ball drop because we were too busy talking and the clocks were a minute or two off so by time we turned on the television they were already kissing!  Isn't that how it goes though...always feeling like you are a minute or two too late?

In the last week of December, I thought I was prepping at an all time stellar level.  I had my 2017 goals in place, I had my major expenses figured out, I had a plan to get back on track with the healthier lifestyle.  I was ready to make 2017 my bitch...

...And then the clock struck midnight without me knowing and life continued on the same path it always has.  In that moment, I realized I'd missed the magic of New Years, the unexplained feeling you get when you know you are able to start fresh again...though you really aren't doing that, you just tell yourself that.

I'm over a week into the year and I don't feel as hopeful or optimistic as I have at this time in all the 38 years before....ok 37 years, save that one year where I slept through the New Year because I didn't want to face the divorce I knew 2010 would bring...though that year did turn out to be pretty amazing all things considered.

So today I am resetting the year, and if necessary I will do it again tomorrow or next week or next month, because we really shouldn't wait 365 days to allow ourselves to start fresh.  We should feel that same hopefulness and giddiness every night, when that clock strikes midnight....RESET.

In that thought, there is renewal...I mean really - day is just crap, dogs puked in your shoe, boss is a dick, world looks like it's sewer deep in the crapper...close your eyes, take a beat, and mentally reset.  Because what are the odds of the dog puke two days in a row....I mean my other two examples could totally happen over and over, but maybe approach how you see it different on the new day.

I really don't know what I am trying to say today.  I feel like I need to do-over, I need to get rid and ignore the last 7 days I've wasted on not hitting my goals or doing the things I said I would to improve my life.

One month from today I turn 39 years old.  I will officially be in the last year of my 30s, and thus far I am not troubled by the thought of getting older.  Truth be told, the 30s were a major time of learning and failing and learning some more...I was much more aware and not as oblivious as I was in my 20s....hopefully the 40s are where I just embrace it all.

To squeeze as much life out of these next 13 months, I set 39 goals for the year...It was a happy coincidence on the number, but I'm taking it as a sign.  Some of the goals pertain to going deeper with my faith, some focus on my work life, others make me be less introverted, while there are those that just sound fun. One big goal is to say YES to life, to those adventures I usually shy away from, those times I fear stepping out of my comfort zone.

If life is what you make of it, I want 2017 to be happy, loving, kind, and with space enough to be at peace with these first 39 years of life thus far.

This next week, I will start breaking down the major goals into smaller check points to keep myself on track.  Being more consistent with the blog is a goal, building my social media following on all platforms is as well.  But my major writing goals for 2017 include releasing 2 in the next 90 days!

I hope all of you are off to a better 2017 start than I am.  Things progress as they should, it's accepting where we are before we can make the changes to get us to where we need to be.

Until next week...set a few goals for these next 7 days, comment them below if you'd like...then work those booties off to hit them! But always remember to leave room for all those other moments, the ordinary ones, where most of life happens.

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